The Oracle 7AM Edition

July 16, 2022

Conditions: Steamy July Morning w/air much too heavy for overhead presses

PAX: (Not so) Big Unit; Tater Tot; Poseidon; Vandelay; T-Swift; Doppler; Wiley; Honey Maid; Cheap Seats; Room Service; Invictus; Wait Time; Skipper; Greenhouse

QIC: Hei Hei

Greenhouse led the PAX in a Warmarama while Hei Hei finished pictures from 6AM

Hei Hei welcomed 14 PAX w/mission statement, core principles, credo and disclaimer

Pre-thing One: Wait Time led the PAX in a Steinyl

Pre-thing Two: Vandelay led the PAX in there rounds of Bolt .45s

Pre-thing Three: Room Service led the PAX in some E2Ks, LBCs, E2Ks

Pre-thing Four: Cheap Seats led the PAX in 6 rounds of Crowd Pleasers

The Thing

Hei Hei led the PAX on a Billy-Madison trip back to school w/a mosey around the area between grades

First Grade: We learned to be Big Boys right out of the bat

Second Grade: Greenhouse ensured we could hold our own on the playground, with Nolan Ryan’s

Third Grade: Doppler continued our quest to dominate the playground with Hi-YAskis (this is the correct spelling)

Fourth Grade: As the girls had taken notice of our playground dominance, Tater Tot led us in Pickle Pushers, with thoughts of his favorite grade school teacher (whose name escapes me now)

Fifth Grade: Big Unit led us in Mountain Climbers, as we prepared for the climb into middle school

Sixth Grade: Poseidon helped us explore our new domain with some Monkey Humpers

Seventh Grade: T-Swift reminisced his awkward first experiences (multiple) with the opposite sex by lying on his back and thrusting his hips, asking “What are these again??” Though I’m certain he was going for Oh Yeah’s, the PAX enjoyed the new move. Vandelay called them T-Swift Humpers, which seems fitting.

Eighth Grade: Given our history of playground dominance and working through our initial awkward encounters, Wait Time led us in Cherry Pickers

Ninth Grade: Vandelay did his best to get our high school years off to a good start, taking us to our first school dance with some Chinooks. The memories came flooding back, and I’m convinced it was the EXACT same move I used at all high school dances (and most every dance since).

Tenth Grade: The dance moves proved too much for any girl to resist, and Cheap Seats led us in some Oh Yeah’s (Tater Tot continued to picture his favorite grade school teacher).

Unfortunately, the series of questionable decisions made by the PAX in its first ten years of school came with consequences, and we were forced to dropout early to deal with said consequences. Sorry mom and dad.


I didn’t write these down, so check slack.


Cheap Seats repeated key points from 6AM flag pass, including recognition for past leadership: Wait Time, Room Service and Vandelay.

I noted appreciated and respect for those who have come before and paved the way. Over the last couple of months, I’ve heard some variation of “you’ve got some big shoes to fill!” on multiple occasions… And I understand the sentiment and I am extremely grateful for and have immense respect for those who have come before me. But I’ve always been cautious about trying to fill anyone’s shows but my own. I think the best thing I can do for this site is bring my full, authentic self to it. F3 has been an absolute blessing to me, and I’m going to continue to let those around me fill my cup until it overflows and hope that the abundance can be used to fill others.

Fomaha - 3376 posts

Our mission is to plant, grow and serve small (free) workout groups for men for the invigoration of male community leadership.

The Oracle

Leave a Reply