St. Patrick’s Day | The Berm | Stone Creek Park | 50 degrees

PAX (13): Tubesocks, Al Boreland, Cataracts, Truly, Pantyhose, Chucky, House Party, Skipper, LPC, Hei Hei, Armbar, Birdman, Sparty

QIC: Sparty

Pre-runners: (4:35) Pantyhose, Cataracts, Chucky, Truly – (4:45) Skipper & some Birdman

Oh it’s the most glorious day of the year, St. Patrick’s Day! My favorite day of the year. I woke up early as I had some fun things planned for the morning. The Pre-Blast alluded to 2 facts about the morning: 1. We weren’t going to take things too seriously today, and 2. We would be searching for a pot of gold. Usually when YHC posts messages alluding to things in the Pre-Blast, you might want to pay attention because I’m going to follow through. I knew the Pre-runners take off early and run away from the AO so my surprise was going to need to be strategically delivered at a time when no one was present. I had planned on stopping at Hy-vee on my way to snag a few Ginger-Ales as I know there are a handful of PAX that are sober, but as I pulled up at 4:45am, I learned that Hy-vee doesn’t open until 6am. Luckily, Kum & Go never closes. However, they don’t carry Ginger-Ale. So Sprite and 7up it was. I arrived to the Berm carrying the “Pot of Gold” and I could hear voices in the distance. While my head was on a swivel, I never found anyone. I strategically placed it on top of the Berm in a location that would be hard to spot from the Shovel Flag. I quickly returned to my car and drove down to the lake. On the way, I passed Birdman who was warming up his joints with a mosey from his home, then crossed paths with the early pre-runners. As I arrived to the parking lot at the lake, I learned that my cones were not in my trunk….. “Wait! I have green bottles!” So I put one Sprite bottle out and one 7up, then quickly raced back up to the Berm. I had my windows slightly rolled down with some Irish Music blaring out my speakers as I raced through the lot like a high school boy trying to impress the other guys. No one gave a shit.

The clock struck 5:15am and as I welcomed everyone with a “Happy St. Patrick’s Day,” Armbar slowly made his way towards the porter johns. While we all assumed he was going to drop a deuce, we quickly learned he was intentionally placing his keys in a spot. I then let the men know that “today is meant to be fun, we’re going to look for the pot of gold, so let’s go.” We started on our first mosey across 168th St back towards the lack. We maintained a nice slow pace which kept the pack together and allowed for a tremendous amount of mumblechatter. As we made our way down the hill, I sped up to join PH and Cataracts and let them know that I saw some green in the distance. Pantyhose had his sites across the lake, while I was referring to about 100 feet up ahead. We arrived at our first stop which was the Sprite bottle and a few chuckles were had. I had the men count into 3 as we were going to do a little 3-man grinder warm-up.


  • Station one – Goofballs
  • Station two – Leprechaun heel touches
  • Push – skip

While I demonstrated the exercises, the men giggled like little girls. Then Skipper got really excited that we all had the opportunity to skip. The Leprechaun Heel Touch form was less than desirable. When I had enough of grown men embarrassing themselves, I informed the men that “I heard the pot of gold is south of here.” So we went on our next mosey and we got on the trail to go around the south end of the lake. In perfect timing, I was asked about how far we needed to go. I let them know “it’s just around the corner,” as we approached a corner. I stopped and acted stunned that there was nothing there. Well, other than piles of dog poop. In an effort to show my astonishment, I asked PH to help lead us in his newly created Squat and rotate exercise which is an incredible crowd pleasure. Chucky loves it and never complains about it. After a 10 count in cadence, we went back towards the parking lot. It was about this time that our man Birdman who had just come out of retirement expressed his displeasure of the amount of running. We returned to the pop bottles for another quick round of a grinder:

  • Station one: Gorilla Humpers
  • Station two: Apollo Ono’s
  • Push: skip – Skipper loved these again

After just a few rounds of exercises, and several rounds of complaints about not being able to find the pot of gold, I confidentially informed the men that we needed to go north on the path. Again, “it’s just around the corner.” This resulted in more complaints about “Oh which corner?” “Is it this corner?” We eventually got to the corner and to my lack of surprise, the pot of gold was not there. Chucky got really excited at the opportunity to lead us in another round of PH Squat Rotations. After these concluded, I said, “shoot, we need to head back to the shovel flags.” Great mosey led by the guy who complained the most about too much running, and lots of mumblechatter. Very satisfying for me. As we all arrived to the shovel flag, I said, “you know what, this is the Berm. Why haven’t we checked the Berm yet?” This led to some frustration as the PAX thought we were done. We arrived at the bottom of the Berm and the plan at this point was to Bear Crawl up the hill as many times as it would take for one of them to see the “Pot of Gold.” To my astonishment, it took 3 trips. Great work Al Boreland! Finally, the case of mixed Irish Beers was discovered. We made our way back to the shovel flag.

Name-a-rama: Great energy from the PAX, lot of enthusiasm. Quickly tricked Birdman as he anticipated the camera and I took it to the “Pot of Gold.”

Announcements: Tubesocks shared that “its St. Paddy’s Day!” Thank you kind sir.

Prayers: Gratitude for teachers and the impact they have had on us and our children.

COT: St. Paddy’s Day is my favorite day of the year, and holds a special place in my heart. That being said, let me clear some things up for everyone. Everyone is NOT Irish today. Either you are or you aren’t Irish. Today doesn’t change that. If you’re going to celebrate today, don’t drink green beer. It’s gonna give you a stomach ache, make your poop change color, and you look like an idiot. Drink an irish beer or whiskey. Also, don’t “Cheers” or say “Salute.” You say “Slainte!” Lastly, St. Patrick wasn’t Irish. He was from England. He was actually kidnapped and enslaved by the Irish. He later escaped to England, then returned back to Ireland and later became the patron Saint of the country.

This holds such a special place in my heart that we named our son Patrick. However you decide to celebrate today, I encourage you to be happy and joyful. It’s a great day to be alive and celebrate with those you love.

Prayer: “May the road rise to meet you. May the wind be always at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face. And rains fall soft upon your fields. And until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of his hand.”



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