October 26, 2021//Westside High School//AO- The Colosseum//Approx. 42 degrees Fahrenheit//

Pax: Betamax, Toadstool, Scoober, Tin Cup, Dirty Bird, Honeymaid, Ice-T, Q-Tip, Trademark, Edison, Samples, Folsom, Safe Ride, Jackrabbit, Stella (STELLA),  Lansbury, Grass Roots, Swinger, Sportiva, Bloodshot, Super Tasty, Vanilla Ice, Hat Trick, Honey Stinger, Oompa, Tugboat  

Q: Tugboat

This was the first time back in the Q saddle in quite awhile for YHC.  Mixed up combination of 5 core principles, disclaimers and other formalities was delivered.  Then we moseyed through the gate and to the goal line.

Warm O’ Rama

YHC led the assembled pax in a variety of warm up exercises.

Pre Thang:  10/20/30/40 Squat Guantlet

Beginning on the Goal Line we did a lunge walk for 10 yards to the 10-yard line

Then we did 25 air squats – as always YHC encouraged the pax to hit 90 degrees depth measured from the top of the thigh

Then we did a bear crawl for 20 yards to the 30-yard line

25 air squats

Then we did burpee broad jumps for 30 yards to the 60 yard line

25 air squats

Then we did a 40-yard dash to the end of the field from an offensive lineman’s stance

25 air squats

Rinse and repeat back to the goal line that we started from. 

The Thang: 4 Man Pods

Admittedly, YHC really botched his explanation of the Thang.  The pax numbered themselves off into pods of 4.  Within each pod, they were supposed to do the following:

Man 1 – 25 Air Squats/25 Merkins/25 Big Boy Situps  – Rinse & repeat until pushed by the runner

Man 2 – 25 Lunges/25 Werkins/25 LBCs in cadence – Rinse & repeat until pushed by Man 1

Man 3 – 25 Jump Tucks/25 Alternating Shoulder Taps in cadence / 25 flutter kicks in cadence – Rinse & repeat until pushed by Man 3 – when pushed take off running

Man 4 – Run a lap around the track and then push Man 1 when you return

Post Thang: Fancy Burpees

In 1991, Reba McEntire recorded the modern country classic “Fancy”.  Although the song was originally written and performed by a woman named Bobbie Gentry in 1969, I will always associate this song with Reba.  The Pax gathered around a portable speaker and we did goofballs standing in place for the 4 minute and 58 second duration of the song while performing a burpee every time Reba sang the words “Fancy”, “Mom” or “Mama”.  The lyrics are provided below and as you can see this equates to 21 or so burpees, depending on how many times Reba repeats the chorus:

I remember it all very well, lookin’ back
It was the summer I turned eighteen
We lived in a one room, rundown shack
On the outskirts of New Orleans
We didn’t have money for food or rent
To say the least, we were hard pressed
Then Mama spent every last penny we had
To buy me a dancin’ dress

Mama washed and combed and curled my hair
And then she painted my eyes and lips, then I stepped into a satin
Dancin’ dress that had a split on the side clean up to my hip
It was red velvet trim and it fit me good
Standin’ back from the lookin’ glass
There stood a woman where a half gown kid had stood

She said, “here’s your one chance, Fancy, don’t let me down
Here’s your one chance, Fancy, don’t let me down”

Mama dabbed a little bit of perfume on my neck
Then she kissed my cheek
And then I saw the tears wellin’ up in her troubled eyes
As she started to speak
She looked at our pitiful shack
And then she looked at me and took a ragged breath
She said your pa’s runned off and I’m real sick
And the baby’s gonna starve to death

She handed me a heart shaped locket that said
“To thine own self be true”
And I shivered as I watched a roach crawl across
The toe of my high heel shoe
It sounded like somebody else, it was talkin’
Askin’, “mama, what do I do?”
She said, “just be nice to the gentlemen, Fancy
They’ll be nice to you”

She said, “here’s your chance, Fancy, don’t let me down
Here’s your one chance, Fancy, don’t let me down
Lord, forgive me for what I do
But if you want out, well, it’s up to you
Now don’t let me down now
Your mama’s gonna move you uptown

Well, that was the last time I saw my ma
The night I left that rickety shack
The welfare people came and took the baby
Mama died and I ain’t been back

But the wheels of fate had started to turn
And for me there was no way out
And it wasn’t very long ’til I knew exactly
What my mama’d been talkin’ about

I knew what I had to do and I made myself this solemn vow
That I’s gonna be a lady someday
Though I don’t know when or how
But I couldn’t see spending the rest of my life
With my head hung down in shame
You know I might have been born just plain white trash
But Fancy was my name (emphasis added)

She said, “Here’s your one chance, Fancy, don’t let me down
She said, “Here’s your one chance, Fancy, don’t let me down”

It wasn’t long after a benevolent man
Took me in off the streets
And one week later, I was pourin’ his tea
In a five room hotel suite

I charmed a king, a congressman
And an occasional aristocrat
And then I got me a Georgia mansion
And an elegant New York townhouse flat
And I ain’t done bad (she ain’t done bad)

Now in this world, there’s a lot of self-righteous hypocrites
That’d call me bad
And criticize mama for turning me out
No matter how little we had

But though I ain’t had to worry ’bout nothin’
For nigh on fifteen years
Well, I can still hear the desperation
In my poor mama’s voice ringin’ in my ears

“Here’s your one chance, Fancy, don’t let me down
Oh, here’s your one chance, Fancy, don’t let me down
Lord, forgive me for what I do
But if you want out, well, it’s up to you
Now don’t let me down
Your mama’s gonna move you uptown

And I guess she did


We did not perform Mary


During the conditioning portion of rugby practice, a former teammate of mine would say “If you’re fighting a bear, you don’t quit when you’re tired.  You quit when the bear is tired.”  That has always stuck with me so I shared it with the group as my COT.  YHC was very wheezy after 5 minutes of goofballs and burpees so I didn’t have lung capacity for very much talking.

Announcements were made. 

A prayer was offered. 

Coffee was consumed.

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