March 30th 2021 / AO Wild Kingdom / 43 Degrees 20 knot breeze

21 PAX: Patton, Armbar, Half-Shell, The Curse, Kielbasa, Barndoor, Crab Cakes, Moon Man, Mufasa, Tonight Show, Italian Job, FNG (Broadside), Butterfly, Chucky, Hard-Hat, Crayon, Hawg, Thomas, Skipper, Pantyhose, Doppler.

I showed up to the boat launch at 0510AM to knock out a fair bit of set-up. I had to take a big lap up over and along the dam setting up cones along the way. It was a relatively warm morning, but the breeze hinted at a winter that was trying to keep its grip on the gloom.

0530 AM

Welcomed our FNG, ran through the 5 core principles, mission statement, and reminded everyone I was not a professional.


After a breezy mosey over to the boat ramp, the PAX were greeted with a nice row of coupons all lined up and ready for a good time. Before we got to lugging those around, we had some warming up to get after.

10 SSH

10 Tappy Taps

10 Big Ones

10 Chinooks

5 Sungods

Jumped right into The Thang: King of the Hill. 

PAX Count off into 7 teams of 3. Each team was assigned a coupon and told to run up the trail through the woods to the dam. At the dam, there were 8 cones prepositioned in a large circle that took the PAX along the dirt trails down the dam, through the field up to the top of the hill, back down the hill to the lake then back up to the main trail. 

Each team had to carry their coupon from cone to cone and then complete the total number of reps dictated on the cone as a team. Keep doing laps until OMAHA is called.

1) Plank Jacks: 75 IC

2) Burpees/Blockees: 25 

3) Air Squats: 75

4) Big Boys: 60

5) Mountain Climbers: 75 IC

6) Dips Top (at the bench on top of the damn): 75

7) Merkins: 75

8) Monkey Humpers: 75 IC

The exercises at the cone went pretty well as they were evenly split up amongst each team. But the long climb up the dam through the field proved especially taxing on the legs. Some groups ended up being at the cones at the same time but there was plenty of room for everyone to share.

Just after 6am I called OMAHA knowing we had a bit of a mosey back to the parking lot, and we had an FNG to name.

The jog back to shovel flags was pretty slow especially with the coupons taking turns being carried by the teams. My 3 man team consisted of Barndoor and Crab Cakes. I handed the coupon off to Crab Cakes at the bottom of the hill by the pavilion/bathroom. Apparently Crab Cakes needed the extra downforce for traction, because as soon as he had it on his shoulder he kicked the pace into high gear. I had to work hard just to keep up. That guy knows all about accelerating.


Back at the shovel flags we did flutter kicks until the 6 was in.

Patton started our Rancid style American Hammers.

Announcements/Prayer Requests

Full disclosure I forgot to ask for announcements and prayer requests because I was distracted by my first ever FNG naming ceremony as a Q. Our new brother Broadside actually EH’d himself and was excited to find a new physical challenge outside of just running. I am confident we have another HIM in our midst!!

We did announce the First F lunch for this coming Friday at Inner Rail, and that it was the final week of Queen Service.


As a Master Sergeant in the United States Air Force I am lucky enough to have seen many different types of leaders. By the time I was given the chance to lead a flight of 47 men and women I knew the type of leader I wanted to be. First and foremost I wanted to be vulnerable. I wanted my team to know my weaknesses so that they could help our team succeed even in areas I was weak. I wanted them to know the personal struggles I was facing, so that if they faced a challenge they would know that they could come to me and trust that I would understand and respect the challenges they were facing in their lives.

I shared a quote from Stephen Russell

“Vulnerability is the only authentic state. Being vulnerable means being open, for wounding, but also for pleasure. Being open to the wounds of life means also being open to the bounty and beauty. Don’t mask or deny your vulnerability: it is your greatest asset. Be vulnerable: quake and shake in your boots with it. the new goodness that is coming to you, in the form of people, situations, and things can only come to you when you are vulnerable, i.e. open.”

I then compared that to a poem by one of my favorite authors, Charles Bukowski

there’s a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I’m too tough for him,
I say, stay in there, I’m not going
to let anybody see

there’s a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I pour whiskey on him and inhale
cigarette smoke
and the whores and the bartenders
and the grocery clerks
never know that
in there.

there’s a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I’m too tough for him,
I say,
stay down, do you want to mess
me up?
you want to screw up the
you want to blow my book sales in

there’s a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I’m too clever, I only let him out
at night sometimes
when everybody’s asleep.
I say, I know that you’re there,
so don’t be

then I put him back,
but he’s singing a little
in there, I haven’t quite let him
and we sleep together like
with our
secret pact
and it’s nice enough to
make a man
weep, but I don’t
weep, do

What I love about this poem is that the poem speaks of hiding your heart and refusing to be vulnerable. The poem itself shows how vulnerable the author is willing to be with the reader, it is a beautiful dichotomy.

I asked the PAX to go into their day and be vulnerable to open themselves up to the pain and the beauty of the day, and by doing so to show those around them that they could be vulnerable too.

Patton took us out in Prayer.

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Our mission is to plant, grow and serve small (free) workout groups for men for the invigoration of male community leadership.

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