AO: The Oracle

March 13th 2021

PAX- Thor, Goodlife, Mufasa, Wait Time, The Plague, Tonight Show, Greasefire, Patton, Grillz, Ice T, Blue Chip, Vandelay, Slow Pitch, Relish, Pothole, Moon Man, Cheap Seats, Convoy, Stink Bait, Nightingale (FNG), Ketchup, Tater Tot, Khakis, Tube Socks, Zamboni (FNG), Panty Hose, Yodel  

Q: Roadhouse

43 degrees, slight breeze, beautiful Saturday morning. 

A small group of us was finishing up a pre-run and came around the corner of the school; there was already a big crowd waiting… Ok.. here we go. 

It felt like it had been a while since I Q’d and I found myself a little anxious. Almost nervous.  I went around the circle welcoming everyone to the day. In the group was two FNGs… now I was a little more nervous. When there are new guys, I want to make it a good experience, make them feel welcome, inspire them. 

I was planning on trying something different this morning and with 28 guys and 2 FNGs, I was starting to question myself. I looked at my phone and it was 5:59. I didn’t have much time to make any changes. And then it happened… A black truck cameflying into the parking lot going about 50 MPH. Bruno Mars blaring out of the speakers. I turned around and word KHAKIS appeared on the license plate. And with that, all anxiety was gone. RESPECT

I welcomed the group at 6 am and walked through the intro. I welcomed the two FNGs, spoke to the 3 Fs, nailed the 5 core principles and stuttered through the mission. Is it invigorate or reinvigorate? I never know. I told the group that today was going to be a Tour de Aldrich. And with that we moseyed. 

Our first stop was the parking lot just East of Aldrich. It took a short mosey to get there and we circled up for Warm-a-rama. There was already some good energy and plenty of mumblechatter. Warm-a-rama consisted of the following:  


SSH’s (Jumping Jacks) 15 IC

Big Ones 1 long one to each side 

Imperial Walkers 15 IC

Sun Gods 10 each 

Goofballs 15 IC

After Warm-a-rama we moseyed up the hill to the CIT parking lot. Again we circled up and now it was time to make the new guys a little uncomfortable. And the best way to do that was a sexy pre-thang. 

Sexy Pre-Thang

Rope Swing 15 IC

Pickle Pushers 15 IC

Pickle Pointers 15 IC

Oh Yeahs 15 IC

Monkey Humpers 15 IC

I wanted to get as many guys involved as I could so I asked for volunteers to count each exercise. The highlight of the morning is when I asked Slow Pitch to count off for Pickle Pointers. He smiled and said, “Ready position and ‘Sexercise!!’” The group erupted in laughter. We finished the Sexy pre-thang and I instructed the group to mosey to the back of the school. 

When we got to the field behind the school we circled back up. The week before this was the site of the worst 2 man exercise I had ever experienced led by our boy Convoy. I needed something to erase that terrible memory from my mind. Only Merkin Mania could do that. 

Merkin Mania X2

10 Merkins

10 Werkins

10 Ranger Merkins

10 Hand Release Merkins

10 chuck Norris Merkins

I am not going to lie. Merkin Mania sucked. It was terrible idea and all it did was add another awful memory to that location. Plan backfired on me. Damn. 

We moseyed from the school down the path to the open grassy area just North of Dodge. Again, we circled up and again I counted on the PAX to help me count. It was time for legs. 

Legs X2

15 Copperhead Squats

15 Bonnie Blairs 

15 Jump Squats 

15 Hydraulic Squats

20 Slow Pitches – calf raise with a thrust

We got back on the path and headed (in the words of Anthony Keidis) under the bridge. Another mosey, another circle up. There were some patterns forming here. Let’s work that core now. 


20 LBCs

20 Heels to Heaven

20 Flutter Kicks 

20 Box Cutters 

20 Heel touches

As we finished this station, I felt like I needed to check the time. We had done 5 stations and moseyed a long way. I didn’t want to run long. I reached into my pocket and removed my mobile device. The time showed 6:30 AM…. What the F@#K? How can that be? Only 30 minutes have passed…. I was shocked and suddenly very concerned that I didn’t have enough to fill the hour. How had it only been 30 minutes? Does anyone else feel like time stands still when you are Q’ing? Is it just me? 

We got back on the trail and moseyed to the playground where we Murph on Mondays. Wait Time got way ahead of the group on the mosey. He was feeling good this morning. It made me feel hopeful for when I am his age… in ten years… (Love you buddy) 

We circled up in the grass just west of the playground. We were close to the houses and I had a flashback to Gunner’s Q this summer where we worked out for an hour in someone’s backyard… I was going to have to be quiet for this station. It was shoulder time. 


20 Carolina Dry Docks

30 Cherry Pickers 

25 Overhead claps

40 Air Presses

We got back on the path to head back to the school. It was a long mosey to the basketball court. It was then that I had to make a decision. Do we do a long Mary? Or do we do some wall work? The wall seemed to be aching for some love and attention so I guided the PAX to the wall. 

Wall Work X2

Wall Sits 30 seconds 

10 donkey kicks and hold for…

Balls to the Wall 20-30 seconds 

Mosey across the court

We circled up on the court for Mary to finish things up. 


Scissor Kicks- 20 IC

Hammers- Rancid Style – 28 IC

And with that, we recovered. The energy in the group was outstanding from start to finish today. Lots of chatter. Lots of laughter. We hit 8 different locations in the area and worked the entire body. It was an honor to lead such a great group of HIMs. What a morning. 

We knocked out Name-a-rama and the FNGs did terrific. It was time to name them. 

Jake is a nurse and after shouts of Focker and Gaylord, we decided on Nightingale. We are lucky to have him as part of the group. 

Taylor works with PantyHose and his last name is Weezy. I really wanted to name him Lil Wayne but after hearing about his love for hockey we went with Zamboni. Another great addition. 


Tater welcomed the FNGs to the group and reminded us all how special it is to have new guys join us. 

Wait Time discussed the Respect pop up on Wednesday. If you are not 50 but bring a 50 year old, you can join. 

Prayer Requests: 

Please keep the Omaha Police office that was shot in the line of duty in your prayers. 

Several PAX members have had loved ones pass in the last week. Keep them in your prayers. 


A few years ago I was introduced to a concept called the Universal Law of Service. It says that the only way you can get what you want in life is to first help others get what they want in life. In January at the Spike my COT was about having dreams. Today is about supporting other people in their dreams. And the only way we can do that is to ask. Ask what people want, what their goals are, what their hopes and dreams are. Find out what is important to them, and make it important to you. This is the best way to build value in our relationships. To bring this to F3 I will say this. If you come to F3 to make yourself better, you will. But if you come to F3 to help other guys get better, it is the best thing you can do and it changes the game. The only way you can get what you want is to first help others get what they want. 

So my challenge for you is this; pick someone in your life this week and find out what is important to them and very simply… make it important to you. It will take that relationship to a whole new level. 

I love you all.


F3Omaha - 1739 posts

Our mission is to plant, grow and serve small (free) workout groups for men for the invigoration of male community leadership.


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