The Combine: The Day Before/The Last Day of

2/5/21. The Combine AO | Kiewit Middle School

PAX:  Hard Hat, Big One, Patton, Khakis (Respect!!), Grease Fire, Cataracts, Jean Claude, Mac N Cheese (Hate), Tube Socks, Roadhouse, Toto, Pantyhose, Dr Thunder, Moon Man, U-Haul, Spreadsheet (Hate), Nugent, Skipper, Tater Tot, Frosty, Arm Brah, 2 X 4, Griswold, Wait Time, Othello, Slow Pitch

Q: Slow Pitch

Weather:  12ish, snow on the ground and cold enough to let you know you’re alive. Oh, and it was icy in spots too.  

The Q, did some recon on Thursday night around 9pm, as he wanted to be certain that the race track had the right amount distance for Friday’s workout. Slow Pitch set his GPS and jogged a couple of different routes, in his jeans and jacket, around the parking lot. He debated with himself between the .11-mile route, timed at 1 minute and few seconds or the .12-mile route timed at the 1 minute and a few more seconds’ route. He agreed on the .11-mile route, after much self-discussion, with the between the ears committee. This would allow for less anxiety and more sleep.

Slow pitched arrived at the AO (Self Proclaimed Hardest Working AO) a little before 5am. His good friend, Sparty, had sent him a text, letting him know that he couldn’t be in attendance, due to a back injury. The Q, definitely knew Spartywould rather be at his own site and stick his flag in a snow bank, rather than listen to himself breathe, in his quiet home. Sorry,Sparty, you had to sit this one out.  You knew there is a good chance the Q is going to need time to catch his bearings, sometime during the workout. 

Slow Pitch set up cones in the parking lot, determining the four different locations where groups were going to perform their exercises. The Q’s mom gave him and his brother, the Nantan, some kick-ass light up cones for Christmas, for mornings like this one. These cones indicate there is going to be some awesome shit go down, right here, by this orange cone. After admiring the cones, he set out, the pre-runners started coming in. Pantyhose told a brief story of how he used his lips and face to break his fall when he slipped on the ice. A few minutes later, Frosty came in and told of a story how he started off his morning run, getting his feet to point to the sky before leaving the parking lot. There will be an ongoing theme here. 

At exactly 5:15am, Slow Pitch nailed the mission statement,struggled with the 5 core principles, forgot to tell anyone that he’s not a professional (there was never a doubt in anyone’s mind) and any FNG’s?  Nope, alright, let’s get started. We counted off into groups of 4 and were told to not forget your number.


Mosey:  Run around the fancy lit cones that are set up around the AO and come back to the Flags, then describe the Thang, which is called The Anvil, from our friends at F3 West Cobb, in GA. Slow Pitch befriended, the previous Nantan, QT, of F3 West Cobb, over the Christmas break and they shared a couple of their favorite ways to bond the PAX. This is a workout The Georgia HIM do with regularity. The individual groups will go to their cone and perform all of the thang together. The Q had the PAX circle up, told them their calves aren’t big enough, did one calf raise, then informed them to go to their respected cone and start, The Thang. They had 35 minutes to complete it.

It goes as such: 5 Burpees – run lap around cones, 5 Burpees, 10 Merkins – lap, 5 Burpees, 10 Merkins, 15 LBC’s – lap… these continue to build on itself until completion, Omaha or deceased.

 5 Burpees 

10 Merkins 

15 LBC

20 Lunges (10 each leg)

25 Mtn Climbers 

30 Plank 

35 American hammers 

40 SSH

45 Big Boy Sit-ups

50 Squats 

During one lap 3 HIM from group number 2 all hit the same icy spot and went down. Slow Pitch was one of them and did it in very close proximity for group number three to witness. After the body count total being at 5 PAX members (surprisingly enough, Khakis, wasn’t one of these black ice victims) hitting the concrete. Othello put a cone over the black ice for all to see. 5 falls in a workout may have tied an F3 record, if that stat is still being recorded. 

Omaha called at 6:03. Most of the groups got through the Big Boys but were not able to get through to the squats. Khakis wasn’t putting up with no one’s bullshit, so he mandated that his group do all the squats.

Mosey to flags. As we were going back to flags, U-Haul, being the stud-HIM that he is, went to pick up the cone, indicating the slick spot. As he picked up that cone, he tempted fate and stepped on, the very spot, that took out many a man, that morning. Ding! Ding! Ding! We have officially broken the, all-time, F3 record for PAX members hitting the concrete before, during and after a workout. This is an amazing stat for those of you keeping book at home! Not certain if we’ll ever see this ever again. 

Knowing it’s not nice to laugh at friends when they hit the ground, the Q waited until after the prayer, to tell U-Haul, that was one of the highlights of his morning and laugh outwardly.

Mary- This is where Slow Pitch shines! Lots of counting and jumping equal a lack of oxygen and ability to see, hear or think clearly. There were 25 PAX members about to see Slow Pitch take a nap in the middle of jumping and counting. After the first set of this exercise, the Q, stopped made eye contact with Othello, who was smiling and so Slow Pitch took that has an indicator he should do a second round. That was almost the finishing move on himself. Afterwards, the “Prince of Passing Out”, Spreadsheet, even asked him if there was ringing in his ears. Of all the HIM that know how to do Name O Rama from a sitting position, Slow Pitch trusts Spreadsheet’s expertise, the most, in this field.

Exercise as follows:

Countdown, countdown, count up, count up to launch: 

​Countdown to 10 in Al Gore, Jump Squat.

​Countdown to 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, with squats after each and back up to 10.

 ​And repeat.

Countdown to 10 in Al Gore, Jump Squat.

​Countdown to 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, with squats after each and back up to 10.


NOR with enthusiasm!  Announcements and prayers. Sadly, two families losing loved ones.

COT: The Day Before or the Last day of

Today is an extremely special day for me. It is the eve of my sobriety anniversary of 14 years, tomorrow. This is the day before or otherwise the last day of. 

14 years ago, today, was the last time that I used mood- or mind-altering substances. It was the lowest of low days. It was the final day. My life was going to change tomorrow, but today I had to make that decision this was the last day of. My life sucked, I was 30 years old, I had over dosed at age 23, had to be revived, but that wasn’t enough, to quit. I had to lose everything over the course of the next 7 years. I was addicted to cocaine, oxycontin/heroin, anything consumable and I drank every day, starting in the morning. I would sit and cry. Lonely, scared, depressed, wanting my life to end, as it was, but unwilling to terminate it. I lost my jobs, girlfriends, friends, got arrested, was tens of thousands of dollars in debt, I left the country, lost the trust of my family. I was a liability, created worry in the lives of others and wished my hope of change would turn into willingness.

There is a song “Changes” by Blind Melon that I would always listen to with hopes something would be different when I woke up.  Here is a part of that song that resonated: 

Just afraid to change, 

When you feel like life ain’t worth living, 

You’ve got to stand up and take a look up, way to the sky, 

And when your deepest thoughts are broken

Keep on dreaming boy, cause when you stop dreaming it’s time to die

And I don’t want to die.  Fast forward to the last line:

When life is hard you have to change

Today, I am a recovering drug addict and alcoholic. 14 years ago, today, I was on the cusp of making the single biggest and most significant decision in my life. I am alive today, because of that decision. Today was the day before my life changed. Today was the last day of, who I was that day.

Tomorrow can be the start of something completely different, if we choose to make that change.

Now your story is most likely not the exact same, but we have all stood at a turning point, whatever that was and said tomorrow will hopefully be different. That doesn’t happen until we wake up, ask God for help, make a commitment, take the action and then yesterday becomes the last day of.  We all have those moments, days and decisions in our lives in which we are standing at the very end of life as we have come to understand it. 

If there is that something, for you, let today be your day before or your last day of.

Slow Pitch prayed out St Francis Assisi – or 11th step Prayer.

Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace

Where there is hatred,

…..let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon;

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope;

where there is darkness, light;

and where there is sadness, joy.

O divine master,

grant that I many not so much seek

to be consoled as to console;

to be understood as to understand;

to be loved as to love;

for it is giving that we receive, 

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

It’s been a humbling experience to lead such a wonderful group of men!

-Slow Pitch

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The Combine

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