IPC Week 1 North Wall Pop-Up: Inspector’s Gadget

September 3, 2020 | North Wall – Pop-up | Elk Creek Park | 63 Degrees

PAX: 7 – L.P.C., Nightcrawler, Sgt. Slaughter, Birdman, Panty Hose, Wait Time, Sparty

QIC: Sparty

YHC woke up a 04:30 thinking that since the park was 3 blocks away, it would be easy to get there early. When he pulled up to 3 cars already there, he couldn’t have been happier! It was evident that these men were not afraid of IPC Week 1 and the beatdown that ensued. Birdman, Slaughter, and Sparty scurried around looking for a nice home to plant our flag for the next hour, and Sparty got a little concerned at what appeared to be a man in the distance walking towards the tree line. Little did he know that Nightcrawler was just on duty doing some recon and making sure there weren’t any mountain lions in the area, or maybe he just needed to pee. Panty Hose and L.P.C. showed up and the HIM were just about to start when they were discussing if they should wait for Wait Time or get started. Right on time, he called YHC at 05:15 to let him know that his GPS took him to the wrong park. Because we are HIM, we waited 5 minutes for our Consigliere. Upon his arrival, we briefed him and then it was time to get to work!

Nightcrawler volunteered to supply the music, and it started with a bang and echoed off the houses. This concerned YHC, but he kept his mouth shut, head down, and it was time to get to work. Sparty set a special timer to go off every minute, on the minute, as well as set his handy-dandy iPad timer. AAAaaaaaand Go!

The Thang

  • 3 Burpees at the top of every minute
  • 50 Hand-release release Merkins

These beasts were not going to be denied as they got into the Merkins with a hot start. Luckily there were only 50 reps as these were painful. Lot of huffing and puffing, but no words!

  • 100 Leg Raises

Sparty warned the PAX that these would be the worst exercise. Time would tell, but one thing is for sure, the leg raises definitely slowed the men down.

  • 150 Jungle Boi Squats “2 Spoonz Style”

While these were not a PAX favorite, YHC ate these up for breakfast and closed the gap on some of the PAX. Still no words were spoken, the panting got louder, and Sparty’s concern with the volume of the music went up exponentially as Rob Zombie’s “More Human than Human” came on. If you know how that song starts, you’ll know what I mean. NSFW if you are now googling it.

  • 200 Big Boy Sit Ups

Mumblechatter started as guys began to hit a wall and encouraging words very necessary. The PAX were all on this exercise for what seemed like 20 minutes as no one could fly through this movement at this point. Grunting and panting continued to grow.

  • 250 Single Leg Lunges

While this seemed like the “easy” exercise on paper, 250 is A LOT. And after all the previous work put in, it was A LOT. And burpees now seemed to have become a thigh break….for two minutes then burpees became a very slow movement. The men started finishing one at a time, and before you knew it, we were down to one man. It was a beautiful sight to as the other 6 HIM joined Nightcrawler in the rest of his burpees and lunges. However, it took about 5 minutes for us to figure out his crazy counting technique – counting backwards from 125 and counting both legs for the same number. It seemed confusing, but at this point, we were all delirious and it didn’t matter. Finishing as one was an incredible moment as fist pounds followed with sweat dripping off of our faces.

  • Some thoughts and feelings from Nightcrawler as he worked through his lunges: With approximately 120 (SL) lunges remaining, and seriously considered that the permanent sting of a DNF would be easier to justify than pushing himself to finish the workout. His inner “Steve” was whispering, “You’re not ready for this. You’ll come back and get it next year.” Then his brothers stepped in and relentlessly affirmed to him that he could do it. And he was “almost there.” He relied heavily on the music to motivate him. As soon as he made the decision to finish, STP’s “Dead & Bloated” came on. It was not very motivational, but it was better than no music. Then, his music stopped! It was truly a mental battle now between “Nightcrawler vs. Steve.” With the PAX giving Nightcrawler the inspiration to end Steve’s reign of mental terror in a final blow of commitment and finish strong. Nightcrawler is so grateful for his brothers, and the reminder the only time he’s truly “alone” is when he is too proud to let his brothers walk alongside him (or maybe lunge & burpees alongside him).

Name-a-rama – Nightcrawler took a quick mosey/walk around to slow his heart rate down as the rest of the PAX discussed what sucked the worse. Upon Nightcrawler’s return, Wait Time provided the lantern light to help the videographer.

Prayers: Continue praying for Slick and his M. Special prayers for Wait Time, his M, and her mother!!

COT: Fellowship at L.P.C.’s truck with coffee. Strong fellowship was had.

Sparty,

Aye!

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