As the Pax rolled in and loosened up YHC played Little Richard’s “Long Tall Sally” as an ode to one of Nightcrawler’s favorite movies, Predator.
0559: One-minute warning
Date-Time Group: 22AUG2020 0600
AO: Aldrich Elementary “The Oracle”
Weather: 71 degrees w/ 7mph wind out of the SE
PAX: LPC, Grillz, Wide Right (not White Rice),Armbar, Birdman, Tug Boat (toot toot), Tater Tot, Rollbar, Roadhouse, Jean-Claude, Khakis (respect), Toto, DaVinci (respect, respect), Vandelay (respect), Two Step, FNG Matt (Porch Swing), Wait Time, A Bomb, Scrapper, Tube Socks, Wentworth, Panty Hose, Patton, Convoy, Room Service, Short Sale, Pothole, Nightcrawler
INTRO: This is F3. F3 stands for Fitness, Fellowship, and Faith. Our mission is to plant, grow and serve small workout groups for men for the invigoration of male community leadership.
QIC INTRO: Nightcrawler, VQ.
FNGs? Matt (t-claps Two Step)
F3 Has 5 Core Principles:
1) Open to all men
2) Always held outdoors, rain or shine
4) Led by the PAX in a rotating fashion (FNGs: not always like today)
5) Ends in a Circle of Trust
Disclaimer: I am not a professional so modify the suggested exercises as needed. LPC, and Armbar, and I have limited emergency medical training. I have my cell phone. Press side button 5 times to call 911.
Situation: Men, we are under siege. The enemy is at our gates. Every moment of every day he relentlessly attacks. The Enemy’s MDCOA (Most Dangerous Course of Action) is to slowly chip away at our INDIVIDUAL resolve to accelerate and devalue the commitments we made to ourselves and to each other. He wants to exchange our habits of purpose with habits of comfort… leaving us neutered…. toothless… and defenseless. The enemy attacks each of us differently. To one man: Addiction (drugs, booze, porn). To another: Escapism. Or Anger. Or Ego. Or Indifference. In F3 we’ve identified the enemy: Sad Clown Syndrome.
The Labyrinth. Labyrinths have existed for thousands of years. Warriors walked them as a form of mental preparation before leaving for battle and prior to returning home to their loved ones. When preparing to face your enemy, you can’t be distracted. Your mind must be clear and focused. Warriors walked the labyrinth and, upon reaching the center, exchanged their herding staffs, blacksmith hammers, farming implements, etc. for battle armor and weapons. IF they survived battle and returned home – they journey back through the labyrinth to process the battle, leave their armor and weapons behind, and prepare themselves to return to their loved ones. Never bring the enemy home.
Labyrinth Run: Identify how the enemy has been attacking you, personally. That will be the enemy you fight today. Warm up mosey, single file, in silence. Depart shovel flags, weaving in and out of trees to the south of the parking lot, crossing the street into the parking lot East of Aldrich for warm-o-rama. Circle up, & PAX count off (28).
JOCK UP! AKA Warm-O-Rama
YHC ensured the PAX knew mumblechatter was okay (encouraged). YHC explained “jocking up” is a military term meaning to get oneself mentally and physically suited up before a mission. (YHC did 3 tours in Iraq – and some of the best times he can remember occurred during the excitement of jocking up. Putting on your gear, doing weapons checks, cracking jokes, giving hugs/fist pounds, talking smack, conducting radio checks, reviewing maps, and generally AMPING UP our common fighting spirit [Esprit de Corps].)
• Sun gods 4c x 10 (forward, back)
• SSHs 4c x 28 (HIMs took turns calling one 4-count cadence, while the remaining PAX counted the rep)
• Good Mornings 4c x 10
• Body Builders IC x 10. YHC demonstrated one rep slowly for PAX to process, we did one rep slowly together, then one rep at standard pace before starting. (During the exercise YHC had to pull the leash back on a couple highly motivated WAR DOGS SALIVATING TO UNLEASH HELL on the beatdown as they started the next rep prior to YHC initiating cadence. YHC felt a little bad about that correction because… GET SOME! However, Discipline.)
PAX mosied to the grass field immediately West of Aldrich Elementary
BATTLE AKA The Thang
– Formed the PAX into 3 squads (9 each)
– Two battle positions 40 yards apart
Battle Position (BP) Alpha (1st squad starting position)
• Chastity Squats (ankles/knees together) x 10
• Carolina Dry Docks x 10
• Single Leg Dead Lifts x 10 left, 10 right
Rise & Repeat until relieved
Battle Position Alpha (2nd squad starting position)
• Body Builder broad jump to BP Bravo
BP Bravo (3rd squad starting position)
• Pickle Pointers x 10
• Blades of Steel x 10
• Thigh Master (split squat, weight on front leg) x 10 left, 10 right
Rinse & Repeat until relieved
Mumblechatter: YHC intended for the Pax to work in 3-man teams for the workout (one Him at each station. The 3 squads were simply to get a rough line up for the Thang). YHC realized after we started, he had not properly communicated that to the PAX. However, each of the 3 squads worked as 3 distinct units, completing the exercises together, taking turns calling cadence, encouraging each other and other squads, and never leaving a man behind. It was cool to see. #FreedToLead. After about 3 rounds at each station, Omaha was called. NOTE: YHC labored greatly over a motivating playlist, which could barely be heard and may have only played through the first or second song. “No plan ever survives first contact with the enemy”. Playlist to be posted on Slack. Might be a good one for Iron Pax!
The PAX were told that we beat back the enemy’s initial assault. We had won the battle, but not the war. The enemy was counter attacking. Pax lined up shoulder to shoulder in one long line running east-west, facing north across the length of the Aldrich field. We counted off (1, 2, 1 ,2 etc.).
Counter Assault: Movement to Contact Post Thang
Man number 1 gets down on the ground. Jumps up and sprints in the time it takes for him to shout, “I’m up, they see me, I’m down”. He hits the ground, does two log rolls to the right (so the next time he doesn’t stand up right where the enemy saw him get down) and executes merkins while man number 2, completes the same (running past man number 1). (Shout out to Rollbar, my demonstrator, for executing a motivated ninja roll, instead of a log roll. Your wax is ON, brother!)
Using this method, two-HIM teams covered each other while advancing across the entire (*) length of the field. It was friggin’ beautiful to watch 28 HIM on the ATTACK, accidently stepping on other HIMs as they log-rolled or merkin’d. Epic mumblechatter ensued, and I wish the whole evolution was recorded. Next time.
As we caught our breath & dusted off, I notified the PAX they had won the battle against their enemy. We were standing victorious on the battlefield! It was now time to return home to our loved ones via the labyrinth.
Labyrinth Run: Silent through trees south of Aldrich parking lot to Shovel Flag. Circle up for 6 MoM.
Mary: Hollow Rocks (4c x 15), Flutter Kicks (4c x 28, each HIM called out a 4 count), Elbow Plank (I think. I blacked out a little at this point)
Named FNG: FNG grew up around Hebron, NE. Tug Boat stated that Hebron is home to the world’s largest porch swing.We were unable to fact check the statement (until now: True). Great work today, Porch Swing!
Announcements: Q school Oracle 0700 and next weekend. My apologies for forgetting any others.
CoT: YHC attempted to communicate his extreme gratitude to LPC for the EH into F3 and the welcome I’ve received from the F3 Omaha PAX. In the 10 years since I left the Marines, I never imagined I would have the opportunity to be part of something like this again. Quite frankly, doing hard things with great men is my happy place. The Fitness component of F3 has reignited my motivation, the Fellowship has given me traction, and I have Faith there is at least 43 more feet MORE for me to run. Which direction? Only time can tell. YHC is completely grateful and utterly humbled to be one of the PAX.
Sky Q: Tater Tot took us home.