The Oracle Backblast: The Tortoise & The Bear-pee

Image result for bear crawl meme

09/22/2018|Boys Town AO|Boys Town

PAX: 31! New AO Record! Wafflehouse (respect!), Hard Hat, Coach K, Hard Time, Reba, Selleck, No Doze, FNG (Jason Smith “Sugar Daddy”), CSI, FNG (Keith Coan “Mayhem”), Low Man, FNG (Ryan Shanahan “Knickers”) , FNG (Daryl Gerardy “Snowman”), Borland, Honey Stinger, Placebo, Gipper, Captain Kangaroo (respect!), Room Service, Sweet Tooth, The Plague, Tonight Show, Brazilian, Boom Boom, Ethanol, Dufresne, Tater Tot, Thunderhead, Lemon Law, Wait Time

Q: Ponzi

Weather:  A chilly 45 degrees

Ponzi welcomed 27 PAX (Hard Time pulled a “Ponzi” & took a little longer getting out of his fartsack but found his way to the group eventually) & 4 FNGS to the Oracle. Mission statement, core principles and disclaimer were given.

Ponzi then informed the PAX today is about ACTION and since they all chose to show up they were all considered men of action. So any mumblechatter or cursing of the name Ponzi would fall on deaf ears as their actions show they came for the pain and to get better!

PAX Moseyed to Warm-o-Rama. Ponzi intentionally kept the Warm-O-Rama within site for any late brethren as he is a chronic late arriver.

Warm-o-Rama:

  • SSH (20 IC)
  • Imperial Walker (15 IC)
  • Sun Gods Sobriety Style (10 IC)
  • Reverse Sun Gods Sobriety Style (10 IC)
  • Werewolf (10 IC)
  • Pickle Pushers (15 IC)
  • Finkle Swings (8 IC each leg)

***At this point, Ponzi asked Wait Time, “Chickens or Ducks?”. Wait Time chose VERY poorly by saying, “Chickens”. Had he chosen Ducks, Ponzi was going to cut the entire workout by half, have ZERO bearcrawls and order donuts & coffee for the group! Sorry guys! Thank Wait Time for that one!

Extended Warm-o-Rama:

  • Catch Me If You Can Indian Run (Indian Run but last man does 1 burpee then sprints to the front)
  • Back to the Warm-O-Rama for 5 Rounds of 4x4s.
  • Mosey to The THANG

The THANG: “The Tortoise & The Bear-pee”

Partner up!

  • Partner 1 performed 1st listed exercise in front of the small trees by the soccer fields.
  • Partner 2 (starting at the goal post) → Bear-pees and repeat while crawling away from partner, towards the flags until Partner 1 reaches you & takes over where you left off.
  • Partner 2 moseys back and begins 1st listed exercise.
  • 4 rounds planned. Ponzi explained the crawling portion of the exercise quite poorly and also VASTLY underestimated the bearcrawling skills of the PAX. Tweaks were made or PAX may have been running from the soccer fields to the lake by the end.

Round 1 (Other partner performs Bear-pees until you complete one exercise and run to him to tag him out)

  • 25 Merkins
  • 30 Air Squats
  • 25 Carolina Dry Docks
  • 25 Crunchy Frogs

Round 2: (Partner switches to Crawl Bear-pees aka Backwards Bearcrawls. Still 5 steps then 1 burpee)

  • 25 Werkins
  • 30 Smurf-Jacks
  • 25 Cherry Pickers
  • 15 Big Boy Sit-ups

Round 3: (Partner switches to Peter Parker Crawl-pees -> Ponzi made the name up. Still 5 steps then 1 burpee)

  • 20 Diamond Merkins
  • 25 Monkey Humpers

After repeated requests and a particularly tricky one from Low Man, Ponzi called…..OMAHA! OMAHA!

4 Total Rounds were planned today but Ponzi over-cooked it a little. Ponzi will tweak this one and perfect it to bring back to The Oracle someday after so many PAX mentioned their hatred for the workout.  

PAX Moseyed back to the shovel flags for…

6 MoM:

  • Van Gohda – 15IC
  • Pretzel Crunch – 11 IC each side – Improper directions were given by Ponzi on this one. Too much blood to the brain was cited as the reason after an insane number of bearcrawls.
  • F3Omaha Classic – 50 American Hammers IC -> led by Boom-Boom. Bad decision by Ponzi.

COT:

 

  • Name-o-Rama:

 

    • Had some GREAT names for the FNGs today. Selleck & Wait Time were on fire! Welcome Knickers, Snowman, Mayhem, and Sugar Daddy!

 

  • Announcements:

 

    • Lemon Law reminded the group to modify and not get injured out here.
    • We had 4 FNGs and are getting closer and closer to our goal of 150 by the END of October! Keep fine tuning your EH skills!
    • Ponzi didn’t get to mention this BUT in order to keep growing we will always need more Q’s. If you’ve been coming to F3 workouts and haven’t had a chance to Q, reach out to any one of us and we will be more than happy to help and can even Co-Q with you if you’re nervous. It really is a good time once you step out and try it once. If Ponzi can do it ANYONE can! We all learned that today.

 

  • Close:

 

    • Closing quote from Ponzi, “What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
    • PAX were challenged to be men of action and not men who say one thing and do another. Your actions will always speak louder than your words. But use kind words too obviously, unless it’s for mumblechatter. The worse the better when it comes to mumblechatter!
    • PAX formed BOM & Ponzi closed in prayer.
    • Good luck to TC, Captain Kangaroo, and Bubba Gump at the Omaha Marathon! We said a prayer for you crazy runners.

 

Special thank you to everyone who came out today! I would apologize for the inordinate amount of bearcrawling but you all secrectly loved it anyway. Thanks for trialing out my odd workout ideas! I appreciate your patience, sense of humor, and willingness to try anything. See you at The Murph!

Aye!

Ponzi

p.s. This is for you, Placebo…

IMG_4974

This critter was found at the end of the workout today and Placebo about cried at the site of it.

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